Passionate Bonds SF 2011

BDSM, D/s, Events Tagged with: , , , , ,
Apr 092011

Last weekend was spent in San Francisco, I had a wonderful time both in the Passionate Bonds Intensive and seeing friends while exploring the city. I’m extremely happy that I made the trip down and it was worth every penny. The description from Midori website can be found on her website.

The description alone intrigued me but once I heard Dart’s Domain podcast, where he interviewed Midori and Laura Antoniou I was sold. I talked to PG and unfortunately he wasn’t able to make it but we realized it would benefit our relationship and my future ones if I went. I booked my ticket, hotel and made arrangements.

The weekend was full of learning new tools and skills, tough and challenging discussion and lots of work. It was a weekend of growth and knowledge for my relationship with PG, myself and for entering and negotiating  a future D/s relationship whether it’s for a weekend or long-term. It allowed me to define what I value, need and contribute and to put it on paper and examine it.

I’ve always know I was different and that my relationship with PG is unique. We don’t want to and can’t follow the “popular” protocols and the ways of acting. I love being bratty sometimes and play fighting which isn’t the way a “true submissive” acts or so I’ve been told. I also love serving him and being obedient, which isn’t that common to mix them both in. We needed to create our own protocols and coming to this weekend has given us the chance to start fresh and make sure the protocols we create work for us and produce that goofy smile. We created a unique mission statement for our relationship and all the protocols should serve that. I love the idea of having a mission statement and to review all these frequently. We have set up some protocols and started using them. Once we are confident in those, we want to create more. Our connect and desire is stronger. I’m considering making our own personal book with photos and text that would include our protocols, mission statement and transitional plans. We could print a new copy every year after reviewing it and updating it.

My fellow participates were incredible,  thank you! They opened up, shared and were great people to be around. I enjoyed working with them and being with them for this journey. Parts of the workshop were really hard. PG and I have already discussed what was to happen in case one of us died so when that discussion came up, I was prepared and ready to talk about it. It wasn’t as much of a  shock talking about it as the first time we did. I still remember how upset and how many tears came out of me with just the thought. It makes it easier to talk about it in advance but it’s an incredibly hard process. We first talked about it over two years ago due to our age difference and my near death experiences.

There was so much that we learned that this post could have been thousands of words however I would encourage you to go if they have another one. It’s for anyone who doesn’t want protocols just handed to them from a website, who appreciates and cherishes uniqueness and who wants an authentic, quality and hot D/s relationship. Oh and the connection, sex and play has increased when I already thought it was at the peak.

Thank you Laura and Midori for doing this intensive and asking those pesky questions.  You gave us all something that we need and thank you for sharing your skills, knowledge and yourselves.

 

 

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Leaving for San Francisco

D/s Tagged with: ,
Mar 302011

I have a lot of fond memories on Sundays, it is one of PG and mine date days. We started our Sunday date day last weekend by cuddling up and talking about our relationship. We discussed and thought about our different rules and protocols as this was our last uninterrupted time before I headed to Passionate Bonds in San Francisco. Since I would be going by myself, we have been talking a lot and we set up checkins and talking times for when I’m away to catch up and discussion what has been going on.

After talking and discussion, we were both getting turned on and decided to play for a bit. PG tied me in a box tie with my hands behind my back to make me helpless. After I was secured and couldn’t defend myself, a gas mask was put on my head to hinder my breathing.  He also put the collar on me, that completely changes my headspace. I become obedient and if I did want to try to break the rules, I would be punished severely.

He loved the fact that my hands were behind me and started torturing my breast with his hands until he picked up the sharp fid and scraped me, bite me and gave me a couple of hickies before taking the Hitachi and giving me a mind-blowing orgasms. It was a perfect afternoon and everything flowed so well. We were both in a happy place afterwards and our connection felt stronger.

I’ll be away for a long weekend but will have plenty of fun stories to share including going to Fist Full of Film, Alcatraz, Japanese Spa and the intensive itself.

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Wonderful Weekend

Bondage, Relationships Tagged with: ,
Jan 302011

This weekend was filled with fun times, pleasure, laughs and marks. It’s a bit hard to realize that the work week is ahead but at least Westward Bound is next weekend and then the move. It was a great chance for PG and I to spend quality time together with no other commitments but each other.

Saturday was a great party over at a friends house. We were able to play on this chair type thing on top of a cage. After being secured around it with rope and having my arms tied to my side, my legs were spread apart. He put one of my legs in the stirrups and tied the other to the metal bars in the windows above. We had a lot of fun with the position and the exposure that it gave. He plugged in the violet wand and would zap my inner thighs, breasts, vulva and all around varying the intensity and intervals. After warming me up, he put my collar on me after I was able to get a lot of my brattiness out. My attitude and mind frame completely changed as soon as the lock clicked. We continued to play with lots of torturing with hands and zaps from the wand.  I was a puddle afterwards and as he untied me, he put me on the ground before we retired to the aftercare area to recharge. We rejoined the party and soaked in the hot tub while socializing, perfect. We always leave his parties feeling warm and happy. Thank you again for the invite and we hope to be able to come to the next one.

After sleeping in after the night before, I was feeling so warm and cozy. We cuddled for awhile before deciding to take advantage of my hard points since they were coming down that day. PG put me into a comfy, face up suspension and let me float for awhile before he dom-nommed me and I fell into a blissful state. Time just flew by as every touch, suck and lick was enhanced. After being up and receiving pleasure, he let me spin before taking me down and resting with each other. We spent the rest of the afternoon pleasuring each other and talking about more training.

I had my collar on for most of the weekend and the feeling of being protected, loved and owned felt right. We haven’t been exploring the D/s part of our relationship lately due to having fun with other things and letting my bratty side come out and play. I believe just letting our relationship flow how it will, is the best way. Right now, it seems to be flowing back to a more D/s.

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Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!

Everyday Life Tagged with: ,
Dec 252010

Christmas coffee with Kahlua

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

This year,  I decided not to try to pull of a rushed trip out East with only spending 2 1/2 days with my blood family since it’s full of  running around, stress and expensive for only a short time. I decided to stay in Vancouver and to spend some time with my chosen family instead.

PG and I celebrated our Christmas on 22nd, where we exchanged gifts and Christmas cards. It was funny that we both picked the same card and I started laughing when I opened up mine and he did the same. It was sweet,  finding poly friendly mainstream cards can be difficult as we aren’t each others one and only and we are not married (or plan to be!).

We got each other the same card!

We had a fun time cooking together and got into doing some resistance play. We went at it pretty hard for a good couple of hours until I was pinned onto the bed with restraints and even though I got free a couple of times, he figured out what I was doing and fixed it. We played with his new spider gag and had a wonderful time playing around.

My gift to PG, a spider gag that he has wanted since I knew him.

We saw each other for a bit on the 24th and 25th but he is helping his other partner take care of someone this Christmas but it was a nice, little surprise. I’m heading out today to spend some time with good friends, eat, drink and enjoy an evening with people I care about.

I hope everyone has a great holidays whether you celebrate Christmas or any other holidays. If you don’t, enjoy the time off.

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Happy Puppy

BDSM Tagged with: ,
Dec 122010

Resting on my couch, cuddled up in blankets while drinking soy egg nog after a blissful day. We’ve been talking about trying puppy play for awhile, picked up some toys and it seemed that we never synced into that space for us to try it until today. The day started off a bit stressful but after spending some time cuddling, my playful puppy side started to come out and we naturally progressed into our first puppy play scene.

It happened so naturally with us cuddling and playing around pawing him like a puppy does and him petting me. The next moment I was getting down on all fours and he was slipping the collar on me and connecting it to the leash. We started off with some training exercises where he would teach me to walk beside him. If I tried to jump ahead and pulled him, he would correct me by pulling on the leash and same if I tried to delay him by not moving.

Water and food bowl, play ball, two bones (one leather), choke collar, fabric collar and leash

It was a fun first training session and being a mischievous, playful puppy led to some corrections. After he was happy with my progress, he groomed me and pet me until we became intimate. I wasn’t sure if it would work for me because when we tried pony play previously, I couldn’t get into the head space to do it but with puppy play, I was able to and it was completely different being in puppy head space.

Crawling, barking, yelping, licking, nibbling and whimpering came naturally, it just flowed. Afterwards, I was cuddled up in bed with him petting me when he slowly removed the collar and leash while relaxing. It was a slow and gentle transition out of puppy space and as I started coming back we started talking about how much it worked for us while making sure to keep the connection going before we had to jump in the shower and start transitioning into the outside world.

We are looking forward to exploring puppy play more and him training me on the basic dog commands as well as some other ones. I seem to have a lot of energy and have to learn not to nibble too hard.

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4 years together

Defining moments, Relationships Tagged with: ,
Oct 312010

Halloween is PG and I anniversary and besides the party, we went out for a nice Italian dinner and spent an evening in. I can’t fully explain the impact PG has made on my life. He has always been there for me, supportive of other relationships and attractions and we have shared so much joy and happiness.  We fit together. Unfortunately, we have faced a lot of challenges that life has thrown at us but we survived it, we are stronger and both better people because of it.

I don’t think I’ve mentioned how we met on this blog. We had seen each other at an old rope and grope group but didn’t get to know each other until we went to a play party on the Ghost Ship. He came up wearing a mask, took my friend and started making out with her. I was getting ready to protect her if she didn’t want to or put up resistant as we didn’t know who it was but it turned out it was okay. She introduced us and things clicked and we decided to do some pick up play. We ended up getting sprinkles of silver paint all over us but didn’t notice until we got home. The next night was Sin Annual Halloween party and we ended up playing there too. Things seemed to click but we both were thinking that we would become play partners and have fun. As we continued to get to know each other and play, our connection grew  but I think we were both hesitant to say anything. I didn’t think with the boundaries that we would be able to be  anything other than play partners due to his other relationship but it was possible and it worked for both of us. Happy Anniversary PG.

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Halloween Dungeon Party

BDSM, Events Tagged with:
Oct 242010

Last night, we were invited to our friends house for a fun dungeon party. Halloween is our anniversary and we wanted to celebrate it there. The house was decorated spooky with lots of great people,snacks and drinks. The energy of the party was warming and sexy. It had such a positive, friendly feeling. He really knows how to throw a party.

PG found a medieval torture costume at a Halloween sale a couple of weeks ago so I changed my costume and ended up going as a medieval princess. It was fun to have matching costumes. In addition, it made role-playing torturer and damsel in distress natural. After hanging out for a bit upstairs and getting a tour of the main floor which we haven’t seen before, we headed down to the dungeon to play.

I took off my dress portion and stripped down but put back on my sheer, medieval cover on to maintain the look. He started trying to attach my wrist to the metal wall shackles however I fought him pretty hard. It probably took about 20 minutes of fighting before he was able to overpower me. A princess can’t go down without a fight. Lots of pressure points, him pulling my hair and me resisting by moving away, pinching and general bratty behaviour.  I love the metal wall cuffs because it is difficult to secure someone if you are resisting. Handcuffs are a lot easier but with these you have to get someones hand in them, get the key and screw it in. The struggling and fighting is so much fun.

After my wrists were secured to the wall, he secured one ankle to hinder my movement (and I think for his own protection). He started flogging me with our favourite flogger, my back and ass started to warm up before he started hitting me harder and harder. I still wanted to fight for “my kingdom” so I tried fighting back with my foot but he ended up just grabbing it, holding it up and flogging my cunt. Of course, he had to inspect me to make sure I didn’t have anything that could be used for escape which lead to a pleasurable fingering.  I have no idea how long he had me chain to the wall for but I was flying high when he undid me and led me to the ground. He wasn’t done with me yet, he  put me on the ground and took out the metal cane and caned me until he was satisfied with the results. We recovered for awhile cuddling before heading back up.

I have a soft spot for hot tubs so after grabbing some food and talking with others, I asked PG to join me. We got in, relaxed and soaked. We had some intimate time together and had a chance to hang out with others too. After getting out, I was hit pretty hard with tiredness from the hot water and play so we found those that weren’t playing to say our goodbyes and went back to my place.

It was a great party and we had a blast, it was a perfect evening. We are both looking forward to being able to make more parties there this year.

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Head in a box

BDSM Tagged with: , , ,
Oct 072010

PG has been working on a box for my head to go into when we play, it would be used for breath play and sensation play. I first saw one on the Upper Floor.  I mentioned it to him and he had a similar vision of something like that. Here are a couple of his thoughts, “When I first saw a girl’s head locked in box in Screw The Roses, Send Me The Thorns, my reaction was much the same as when I first saw water bondage – so sick, so wrong, so hot! It’s perhaps the ultimate in objectification, plus, as I’ve designed this one with twin hatches, access for use. Alpine’s been beyond patient waiting for this (I got sidetracked by some major outdoor trips this summer, so I was months later with it than I’d intended. It gave a whole new meaning to “Beg for it!”) Still all things eventually come to those who wait. We gave it a very successful debut at MVK last month and have already been invited to dinner by a couple who want to pick our brains for making their own.” It was difficult being patient and seeing it being built without immediately wanting to try it but it was well worth the wait for me and PG kept my mind on other things. PG is already thinking about a version 2.

The Box that PG built

We decided to try it out at MVK in September. I was nervous as we haven’t done a full scene with it and I only had it on for a couple of minutes previously. After doing a DM shift, we grabbed a suspension frame. I had to refresh myself and when I got back, it was all set up. I couldn’t help but noticed I was wet and giggling.

We started by having me kneel while he put the box of my head, I slowly stood up as he adjusted the ropes. It was an odd sensation, I could hear everyone around me muffled but not see a thing. We ended up keeping the door at the front open to make sure I received proper airflow as I was getting hot and with the loudness of the dungeon, he wanted to be able to hear me even with our visual safeword.

When I play, I usually like being able to see what’s going on, look at the person I’m playing with, maybe kissing them and get nervous and wet when I see what is coming next. With having that cut off, it was odd. He spanked me, beat me with my favourite steel toy, teased me and then we got into some bratty play with me trying to kick him without being able to see where he was going on. It was so much fun trying to be bratty but I failed. I was flying high and the more worked up, the harder it was to breathe. We had a great scene and by the time we were finished, I was a puddle.

The evening was perfect and I love our new toy, it means even more since PG made it himself. I’m looking forward to playing with it more and hopefully getting some photos with me in it once both of us recover from being sick.

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His pet

D/s Tagged with: , ,
Aug 212010

PG and I have been talking about the status of our relationship lately and  how things are going. It was about a year ago that we realized that our relationship was becoming more D/s based. Over the year, we’ve realized what works for us and what doesn’t. We created a ritual for when he comes over and before he leaves my place, which has really grown on us and helps us both shut the world out along other things.

We’ve been making casual references to him owning me but didn’t actually talk about it till last week. There are some challenges that we have, (what relationship doesn’t) such as balancing our relationship with other commitments and relationships. We wanted to classify our relationship with something that indicates ownership. That thought made me feel warm inside and it just felt right. For me, the word slave doesn’t sit right with me within my relationships. I love the times when I can be bratty, play fight and attempt to hold out but I also love the times where I’m obedient, do as I’m told and act the way he wishes me too.  We both love the free flowing nature of our relationship and our dynamic. The word pet came out of his mouth and it felt right.

Everyone has different definitions of what certain words mean but for us it means that there is that strong, loving connection and ownership in a fun, loving way. I still get to be bratty (sometimes), energetic, loving  and resistant. There is also the training and obedience aspects of it which we are exploring more and more. I am dedicated to our relationship and to him.  It allows the room for other possible relationships to grow and develop, which is important for us. Our definition will grow and change but it will be interesting to see where our relationship continues to leads us.

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Scenes don’t always go as planned

BDSM Tagged with: ,
Aug 062010

After not being able to play in a while, PG and I decided that we both needed a hot and rough scene.  We both got everything ready and he had the advantage by putting me in a breast harness. We fought pretty hard but I was on the losing end of the battle. I put up a pretty good fight but he knows my weaknesses to well and uses them against me.

He tried to get me in the sling but I fought away for a while until he was able to get me into the sling by pulling my hair and nipples with enough force. I kept fighting in the sling but he overpowered me again and I was locked in. After slapping me around, he pulled out the violet wand but one piece was missing. He was looking around for it but the piece in between the inserts and wand was left at home. We were a bit worried at first but he remembered he had another set of inserts at home. We couldn’t help but relax and cuddle once we figured out where it most like was. It put a dent in that part of the scene for the time being. Stuff happens and you can’t take it seriously. We planned on using that toy but we ended up having a great rough scene and moved on to a caning scene that left my butt glowing.

I am looking forward to getting zapped soon.

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